How Your Money Mindset Shapes Your Romantic Relationships
When we think about money, we usually focus on budgets, investing, salaries, or savings goals. But what if I told you that your feelings about money could be directly shaping who you fall in love with?
Let me share a real example. A woman I coached came from a background of generational wealth. She had attended top schools and never needed to worry about financial security. But her experience of money was deeply tainted—particularly through what she observed in the men around her. Men in her life had used money as a tool for control, manipulation, and dominance.
So she developed a subconscious belief: men with money are bad people.
What happened next was almost inevitable. In her adult life, she was repeatedly drawn to men who had little interest in wealth, who lacked ambition, or who needed financial support. She played the caregiver, the provider, the supporter. And while she didn’t realise it at first, over time this created deep resentment, burnout, and emotional exhaustion. She felt unsupported, both financially and emotionally.
This dynamic is not uncommon. Many women are raised to nurture, to care, and to share—even when it means overextending ourselves. When coupled with negative money beliefs, it’s easy to see how financial patterns in relationships become a cycle.
Now, this doesn’t mean women should never support their partners, or avoid men with lower income. But relationships need mutual respect, effort, and contribution. If one partner is consistently giving, and the other is passively taking, it becomes unhealthy—fast.
And here’s the tension: while many women want equality and independence, we also long to be supported. To feel cared for. To be assred by a partner, “I’ve got this.”
That’s not weakness, or anti feminist, it’s our Divine Feminine. That longing to rest in safety, to be held.
So what’s the takeaway?
Your money mindset is shaping more than your bank balance. It’s influencing the people you date, the partners you choose, and the roles you play in love. If you find yourself in repeating patterns of unequal relationships, ask yourself:
What do I believe about money?
What do I believe about men with money?
How comfortable am I receiving support?
Do I feel comfortable asking for help?
Do I feel safe being taken care of?
The answers to these question may be the key to unlocking why you continue to make unfullfilling or negative relationship choices!
Awareness is power. And when we begin to rewrite our money story, we can attract relationships that are healthier, more balanced, and built on mutual support—not subconscious survival patterns.